Heaven Help Us ! !

I just received the registration tabs for my twelve foot aluminum boat from the Washington State Department of Licensing. Enclosed with the new tabs was a full color tri-fold brochure warning me about the dangers of carbon monoxide poisoning when boating.

Fortunately, since I was educated in the Washington State School system, they assume that I am not smart enough to deal with long words, so they refer to carbon monoxide as CO.

My twelve foot aluminum boat in the foreground.

The brochure was also full of pearls of wisdom including the statement that "if you suspect carbon monoxide poisoning you should seek fresh air". Funny, I always though that if you suspect carbon monoxide poisoning you should immediately wrap your lips around the exhaust pipe of an idling Hummer see if you can suck hard enough to collapse the muffler!

Included with the brochure was a spiffy decal which by law must be affixed to my boat in a location visible to all passengers. I wonder what the jail time is for failure to affix the carbon monoxide warning decal? I'll bet it's more severe than sneaking in from Mexico!

Now carbon monoxide poisoning can be a real problem with larger boats with enclosed cabins as exhaust can easily be drawn into the cabin, and the result can be deadly. Smart big boat owners have carbon monoxide sensors in the cabin that set off an alarm if carbon monoxide is detected. However, look at my boat in the picture above. Not only is it an open boat, but the exhaust is under water, and if the engine is running, the boat is probably moving, and in my case, moving at full throttle. Carbon monoxide poisoning? It's just not going to happen!

The state's response will most certainly be something along the lines of ".... it was less expensive (translation: easier, and it's not my money, anyway) to send the brochure and decal to everyone."

Baloney...............