Monday, July 31, 2006

Home Security System

HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM IN THE SOUTH

1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine and your NRA magazines.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went for more ammunition. Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls -- they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood.

Anyways, I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside.

--- Credit to LouG

3 Comments:

At Monday, July 31, 2006 7:12:00 PM, Anonymous IndianCowboy said...

lol that's almost exactly what you'll find on my doorstep literally. except for the note.

 
At Wednesday, August 02, 2006 1:39:00 PM, Blogger joated said...

It'll work... if the perspective perps can read.

 
At Friday, August 04, 2006 2:31:00 PM, Anonymous gullyborg said...

make sure your note has small words spelled foe-net-ick-lee.

 

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