Thursday, December 08, 2005

To All My Good Pro-Gun Canadian Friends

To all my good pro-gun Canadian friends, I'd like to invite you all to come to Washington state.

However, like all things, there are right and wrong ways to go about it.

For example, emigrating to Washington State is really simple. When you cross the border, just tell them you are heading to Starbuck's for some coffee, then just move in and stay. What could be easier?

Whatever you do, don't try to establish yourselves as legal immigrants, if you do, you throw away most of your rights. If you are here legally, and you want to attend the University of Washington, or any of the other State funded colleges, you will have to cough up out of state tuition, which is a lot of money. If you are here illegally, you qualify for in-state tuition! I'm not kidding!

Make sure you locate fairly close to King county so it's easy for you and your relatives, living or deceased, to vote. It happens all the time in King county.

Whatever you do, don't give them a local address where you are living. Tell them you are living on the street, and in King County they will let you register to vote and use the county courthouse as your residence address.

Food stamps, no problem. Housing assistance, they're glad to help! And don't worry about being found out, either. The politically correct police in the Seattle area aren't allowed to ask you about your citizenship status.

Get busted for a minor traffic violation? Ignore it, it will go away automatically as long as you aren't here legally.

Why fuss and fume any longer about the Canadian government and Canadian gun control.

You are always welcome here in Washington, and we, at least for now, still get to own handguns!

Oh, and by the way, tell 'em your name is
Osama Gonzales..............


At Thursday, December 08, 2005 9:14:00 PM, Blogger Jerry The Geek said...

I am very, very frightened by this.

At Friday, December 09, 2005 5:36:00 AM, Blogger Mugwug said...

Oh man, except for the part about "starbucks" that sounds like an awesome plan.

I'm still considering trying to claim political asylum in the US as a result of political persecution of gun owners here in Canada.

(I guess California would be the wrong state to flee to then, wouldn't it?)

At Friday, December 09, 2005 10:09:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jerry, fear not. I've seen you shoot! Do not fear the coming conflict, continue to prepare for it.

I puzzled a bit at this bit of Canadian socialist nonsense, until I actually read the words of PM Paul Martin.

Then it became crystal-clear.

According to the PM, Canadians don't fear the Criminals, they fear the Guns that the criminals use. So, the Canadians are going to collect all the handguns of law-abiding owners, dispite screaming at the USA on many occasions that the criminals are arming themselves with guns from the USA, not from Canada.

In America, we don't fear the guns, we fear the criminals that use them. So we have built many new prisons and we pay taxes to keep more and more criminals locked up.

Could the Canadian PM's logic be more screwed up if he had tried to srew it up?

I don't think so. Therefore we must assume that the man is irrational. Somewhere, in the vast body of Canadian Federal Law, there must be provisions for removing a Prime Minister who is irrational.

Oh, yes. The electoral process. Well, in about a month the Canadians will have the chance to do that.

Here's to their success.



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